


Finding Home

by MaccaStar



Category: Gundam Wing
Genre: Aggression, Angst, M/M, Preventers (Gundam Wing), Rivalry, Space Politics
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-01
Updated: 2020-08-01
Packaged: 2021-03-05 22:41:45
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,359
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25642975
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MaccaStar/pseuds/MaccaStar
Summary: It's been four years since the end of the war. Heero finds himself unable to live a normal civilian life as he first wanted, and leaves to join the Preventers. Angst and unexpected clashes follows.
Relationships: Chang Wufei/Heero Yuy
Comments: 6
Kudos: 16





	Finding Home

**Author's Note:**

> Congratulations to me on my first fic. I've found that only after watching Gundam Wing can you understand why so many fics were drafted for it. I may not write another fic again, but I'm happy to present this one to the world at large. [EDIT] I've spent too long listening to "Let Into Top". Please take this update, which adds some spot sketches.

After the course of events in AC 196, humanity did at first seem like it was headed towards peace. But only a handful of short years later, unrest was already at the doorstep. The people discovered with shock that many of the previously plentiful resources had been entirely used up in the war. Asteroid after asteroid were revisited, only to be found stripped bare, the metals within entirely mined out to create the endless mobile doll troops of wartime. Where people once assumed there was plenty, there was now scarcity. Peace was starting to crack at the seams in the face of this revelation. Far colonies found themselves without the ability to provide for their ever-expanding populations, and the strain leading back to Earth was becoming immense.

Heero was set adrift after the war. Many of the others found their way soon enough. Quatre in particular was one of the leaders of the rebuilding effort. He seemed born for the role, and the public adored him. Heero would watch him on the television, silently envious. Relena, too. She was still the world's darling, as of yet unable to step wrong, her fortune and charm carrying her through every movement. Heero, however, fell into various part-time jobs. He had wanted to experience what normal life was like for everyone else. Each one started out promising, and then fell apart in the face of his unrelenting dissociation with humanity. He simply couldn't go through the motions expected of anyone facing customers. Each time, he would be fired for coldly refusing a customer's complaints or walking away from the problems at hand. And each time, he'd move somewhere new and try to start over. It all seemed so trivial, even when he found himself on the step with another letter of termination in hand. With few belongings and even fewer memories of each town, he assumed he would just know when he finally found the place he belonged. Then he would build his life properly. Belongings, connections, could wait until he had found home again.

Years passed in this way, until one day he received a letter. It was from Sally Po, on the rebuilt Lunar Base. She had finally tracked him down, it said. She had need of him. With the new unrest in space, the Preventers had moved their center of operations to Lunar Base, and they needed the best of the best. Heero stared dumbly at the letter. Go back? He could. He could go back to the only thing he seemed to know how to do. Down in his core, he felt a deep cold. As he discarded the letter to the nightstand, he laid down on his bed, staring at the ceiling. Heero didn't think he wanted to return to war. It had lasted little more than a year, but it had felt like a decade. But, he reflected soberly, he was not advancing here on Earth. He forced himself to count the number of towns he had been through, the number of failed jobs, in the last four years. Seven. A ridiculous number. Did he have anything in common with the people here? It was a question that faded out without an answer. He turned his head and glanced around the bare metal room, the undecorated walls. There was nothing here for him. It was yet another link in the chain that made up the next failure of his life. Something had to change or he would never escape this loop. Heero held the letter over his head, skimming over it again in the dim light from across the room. A transport to Lunar Base was leaving in a week from an Earth spaceport not too far way. She would be waiting on the moon for that transport's arrival, wrote Sally, in case of his decision to join. The path was there, and it was too easy to take. He would go, he thought, even as he laid restlessly into the dim hours of the morning. Time once again felt like it was going nowhere at all. He got up as the sun rose, sent notice to his landlord, packed his few things, and left.

Sally waved from across the passenger terminal. “You decided to come,” she said.

“Yes. You caught me at a good time,” replied Heero.

“Did I?” She studies his face. Impassive. Not much different than the Heero she had met years before. Taller. A shorter haircut. Trendier clothes. But the same look in his eyes. It was slightly worrying that, perhaps, there was no more warmth than the Heero of wartime. But, she mused, it was also exactly why she had brought him here. Things would reveal themselves in time, and there was a job to do. “Well. Let me get you set up with your living quarters. I'll have you working under me on my personal team, but I can't have anyone getting too jealous, either. Your apartment will be in the same block as the general squadron so you don't seem too favored, but it's been set slightly apart for privacy. You can get settled in today, and I'll brief you tomorrow.”

“Appreciated,” was all Heero had to say as she began to lead the way.

Sally paused, eyeing the single bag he brought. Well, of course. A soldier wouldn't want to be bogged down by too many personal items on what was described as a developing front line. She swept the thought from her mind as they traversed the utilitarian corridors of Lunar Base. With a brief flourish, she indicated the entrance to his new living space. “Here we are. Please make yourself at home, and I'll see you in the command center upstairs at 0800 tomorrow. There's a map of the place in your email so you can find it. It's changed from before, of course. Rebuilt from the ground up,” she said. Heero silently nodded and entered, closing the door behind him unceremoniously. Sally took it with poise, and simply went back to work. She'd have time to discern more about his current state of mind tomorrow.

The interior was a bit warmer than the corridors outside. Rather than steel grey, the apartment had neutral ivory tones on the walls. The kitchenette had a small breakfast bar that opened directly on the small living area. Through one door, the bathroom, through another, the bedroom. A TV was embedded in one wall of the living area, opposite a plain, but soft, couch. There were two stools at the breakfast bar. A bed in the bedroom, with a fold-out nightstand on either side and lights embedded above in an overhang. A closet for clothes. All the basics of living. It was certainly better looking and even slightly more expansive than the apartment Heero had just left last week. He felt a sort of offhand irony about that, but couldn't quite piece together his thoughts about the changes in his life to pin the concept down. He glanced at his emails as he sat down on the edge of the bed. A dozen from personnel. Documents on his new assignment, his contract, covering his pay, food, apartment, and everything else, down to funeral arrangements. Funeral arrangements. He stopped scrolling there. His time during the war was mercenary and wild. Piloting the Gundams was a personal choice, done as a rash teenager, with next to no oversight or guidance. Nobody was paying him or providing meals. Certainly nobody had put it in writing that it was potentially deadly. Now that he was an adult, here they were laying everything out carefully for his consideration. His vague sense of irony grew stronger. With a sigh, he started the process of signing each document. This was the life he kept choosing. He unpacked his things and then did what he did in every new apartment: laid on the bed and stared at the ceiling, feet planted firmly on the floor over the bed edge. Every ceiling felt the same. Maybe this wasn't home either. He got up to take a shower.

0800\. Heero walked into the command center and glanced around. It was quietly buzzing, pairs and trios of soldiers looking over charts, computers, and papers. Sally Po sent a reporting soldier on his way and turned to Heero. “Splendid. You're here. Things are getting more urgent. Housing is at such a premium that colonies are collapsing economically, and there's whispers of a new faction that's sprung up. They plan to raid anything and anyone for resources so they can house their colonies' homeless. Their situation is a difficult one to be sure, but we can't allow resources going to other colonies to be raided indiscriminately. There's reports from agents that this new faction plans to raid a cargo transport of titanium on the way to colony XV-22000, close within Earth's space domain. I need you on the team.”

“I'll be getting into it immediately, eh,” Heero said as he looked at the tablet Sally handed to him. It had charts on conducting a rendezvous with the cargo transport, and the expected direction the raiders would come from.

“I didn't write in the letter how urgent it was. I didn't want to pressure you too much when you'd gone back to civilian life. But we need you for this, Heero. You have the experience in handling a situation running out of control. This situation could get very bad, very quickly. The Earth government and Colony government are already entering the final negotiations for redistributing resources. If something serious were to happen here, it could throw everything into a spiral. We've had other incidents, much farther from Earth. But this close to Earth and the whole thing will explode.”

“Nip rebellion here, and negotiations continue. The people get what they need, and everything is fine...” Heero trails off, as he considers how many times he thought he was doing the right thing in the past, only for it to go horribly wrong.

“Things aren't how they used to be, Heero. People are working as hard as they can towards peace. They just need to be a little more patient. This is why the Preventers were formed – to create the time people need to work towards peace. This isn't suspicious data from an unknown source. We're the best there are at this.”

“The best there are, huh.” Heero had a look of sudden realization. “I thought Wufei joined the Preventers years ago. Will he be on the team?”

Sally gets a pained look on her face. “He disappeared two years ago. I haven't had word of him since. Wufei was doing well at first, but seemed to be more and more dissatisfied as the months passed. One day he simply wasn't here any more. Shipped off on a transport without informing anyone. No explanation.”

Heero couldn't quite contain his disappointment. “I'd have known I could depend on him to follow through on any plan we had,” he said.

“Yes, it was a great loss for the Preventers. But we'll have to do this without him.” Sally sternly pointed Heero over to a cluster of soldiers by the main computer banks. “I'm putting you in charge of team Bravo. I'll need you to review thoroughly with them the route of defense we'll be taking in this engagement before heading out. Keep in mind that flexibility in the heat of the situation is a must.”

Heero saluted. Time to get to work.

It would feel odd to be out in a skirmish without a mobile suit, thought Heero. They had been banned after the end of the last war. Naturally, though, humans couldn't contain their desire to advance. With heavy regulation, they were brought back as construction machines. No armaments, no spaceflight capability, and only a limited number per colony or city. Their help as constructors couldn't be overstated. The propaganda around rebuilding a tool of war as a tool of construction and progress did much to recast the mobile suit's image. Quatre's company was massively successful as the main manufacturer of the new mobile suit constructor lines. Overall, the mobile suit was well on its way to build a new future out of the ashes of what it had destroyed. Heero mulled over the details of recent history as he put on a space suit, when Sally Po arrived just outside the locker room.

“Heero. I have some important news that I'd prefer to tell you in person. Can I come in?”

Heero sealed up the front seam on his suit. “Yes.”

Sally came just inside the door, but kept her distance from the dressing bench. “I've requisitioned you a mobile suit.”

“What?” He stopped dead in his tracks.

“It's not common knowledge. The Preventers have three mobile suits in their armament, and I'm requisitioning one for this mission. It's yours. It's a modified construction model sealed for space use, but it's plenty capable.”

“You have armed mobile suits available? You don't think that's as much of a threat to peace as these raiders that are about to attack!?” Heero exploded, slamming a fist into a locker next to him. He glared at Sally.

“It's a necessity.”

“And if this skirmish gets found out? Displayed on the news?” Heero felt like his eyes were burning.

“It's a risk the Earth Government was willing to take. There are ways to spin it. That's above my paygrade, though. But I won't let you go out with less than the best we have if we're to stop this at the root.” Sally sighed.

Heero was silent, staring at the ground. It was just like humans to do this again. First three, then twelve, then a hundred, then everyone was back at square one.

“We're doing this for the people,” Sally gently reminded him.

“Is this what the people want?”

“It's what the people need.”

Everything seemed to drop out of Heero at that point. He didn't care any more. The floors were cold, the walls were cold, the people within them were cold. Space was cold, too. There was nowhere to escape the unrelenting bitterness. “Show me to the hangar. I'll do it.” said Heero, with an edge to his voice. Sally only nodded.

It wasn't a Gundam, of course. But it stood just as tall, and it would work much the same way. It was a generic tan, with no organizational decals or designs. A simple head with a single through-screen. A forgettable construction mobile suit, if it wasn't for the beam saber at the hip and the gatling gun on the opposite arm.

“There's rocket launchers concealed in the shoulders as well, but that's about all we could do. I trust that it will be easy enough for you to pilot,” Sally said, arms crossed.

“They're all the same.” Heero gritted his teeth.

“The fuel should last more than long enough for this mission. We used the same flight model as the Gundams to outfit it for space travel. Godspeed, soldier. And thank you.”

Heero said nothing more as he climbed into the cockpit. He hated how familiar it was. They were all built the same inside for ease of use, even now. A tweak here, a tweak there, and both the construction machine and the war machine were the same. How quickly everything could slide backwards with just a tweak. He sat there, thinking about what he'd been told about the current state of the world. Heero could understand the view of these raiders. Redistribution talks had been going on for nearly two years now. The strain must be unbearable for the colonies. He'd spent four years on Earth now, and had not found home. Perhaps the colonies were where home really laid for him. Maybe he was on the wrong side once again. But, his thoughts hardened, putting this delicate peace at risk when the new bill was likely to be signed off on within a month was too much. It was too late to be acting out like this, so close to resolution. Heero buckled the safety harness, and launched out the bay doors. Team Bravo followed in a cruiser and some individual spacecraft.

Maybe after this, he would try some colony worlds. Trowa and Quatre lived on the colonies. Heero could not really remember his childhood in the colonies well, but perhaps even one familiar face around could help him learn to get along with a new city. He'd made one change in his life already. What's one more? Thoughts of a potential future filled his mind on the way through space to the rendezvous point, occupying him until, with a start, he realized that the cargo transport was within view. It was then that his radar went seemingly haywire. Even with all the intel in the solar system, the raiders had managed to beat the Preventers to the punch. Small, agile craft were converging on the transport, set to overwhelm with numbers what they could not do with firepower. And then, Heero noticed a larger blip than the rest. As he and team Bravo set their burners to maximum in an attempt to cut the raiders off, Heero saw what set it off come into view.

It too, was unassuming, only grey. A mobile suit so similar to Heero's. He broke out in a cold sweat. He'd only just thought of the terrible possibilities of his own suit just hours before, and here it was already coming to pass. How many other mobile suits had been modified for space? How many were waiting in the colonies, built by resentful, desperate people? He saw a future stepping backwards into the past. In his own desperation, Heero charged directly towards it. With a clash reverberating through his entire skeleton, shaking the teeth in his skull, Heero smashed his mobile suit directly into the other one. It was only then he remembered that he had armaments. Snatching the beam saber off his mobile suit's hip, he pulled back to deliver what he thought would be a decisive blow. To his shock, his mobile suit's hand was immediately knocked aside by the other suit. Brandishing a glaive, it came at Heero with a ferocity he did not expect. Swiftly set onto the defense, Heero found himself responding to rather than leading the flurry of following blows. The glaive was an energy weapon itself, capable of defending against his beam saber without crumbling. It was all Heero could do to stay evenly matched. With a sudden gasp, Heero launched himself backwards to break away and re-evaluate.

Something seemed odd. His brain seemed to fly through flashes of different thoughts and emotions when he suddenly realized. He knew this person. But who was it? A second was all he had before he was back in the thick of it. The opposing mobile suit was laser-focused on him. All Heero could do was hope that the rest of team Bravo was handling the other raiders without him. The sweat on his brow started to drip closer to his eyes. He dashed it away, and leaned in. Feelings from years ago were welling back up within him as he fought, pouring out of him, pushing his hands forward. He wasn't out of shape after all, his brain screamed at him. Heero was losing himself into the choreography of the fight. No longer was he on the back foot. Every blow parried, each attack traded in turn. In a split-second, he felt an opening more than saw it, and without a further thought his beam saber went for it.

The glaive spun off into space. Heero watched it flicker out of view, gasping for breath after his exertions. Something in him told him the fight was over, even though both of them still had other means to fight with. He turned back to the mobile suit in front of him. It was then he noticed that the cockpit had opened, and out of it stepped a suited figure. “You've bested me again,” came the voice over local comm channels. It was then that Heero knew. It wasn't just anybody in front of him. It was Wufei.

“Wufei...” said Heero in disbelief.

“Open your suit. I need to see you face to face,” demanded Wufei. Heero flicked the switch, and within the minute Wufei was above him within the cockpit, arms crossed. “You joined the Preventers?” he interrogated.

Heero glared back. “You left the Preventers?”

Wufei gripped the armrests and leaned down, smacking the forehead of his helmet against Heero's, grinding it down. “They weren't doing enough. I would know. I was there. The colonies suffered, even under their watch. I saw as everything deteriorated. Where were you, o savior?”

Heero didn't feel a need to explain himself. All of them had done whatever they wanted through the years, Wufei most of all. Justice. Honor. Wufei was too caught up in ideals. “I'm not the perfect soldier trotting off to war the way you are, Wufei. I went and got a life,” Heero said. He knew it was a lie, but there was no way he was admitting that right now. Heero saw Wufei's eyes sharpen at that, still so close to his face in the cockpit. Wufei let go and drifted away, but continued staring down. He seemed to quiver.

“After saving Earth and the colonies, you abandon them again? Even after what you showed me last time? I thought you were better than this.” Wufei moved to leave the cockpit. Heero grabbed his ankle.

“Wufei. Stop fighting. They're about to finish the redistribution bill. You're jeopardizing everything for one transport of resources. Earth will see this as an act of aggression since it's so close to home.”

“Even after they sign it, they'll fight over the details and slow everything down. The colonies have waited years already. Even if Earth went as fast as it could right now, it's not as though resources magically appear where they're needed. It will take more years to fix this wrong.” Wufei jerked his foot, but Heero wasn't letting go just yet.

“Wufei. You need to stop. This is the better way.”

Wufei kicked Heero's hand off with his other foot, sending him careening into the cockpit ceiling. He let out an indiscernible yell of frustration. As he propelled himself out of the cockpit of Heero's mobile suit and back to his own, Heero heard faintly, “I don't know how,” over the still-linked local comms. Before Heero could say another word, the other mobile suit was already jetting away through space. Heero came back to himself, and finally took the time to assess the whole situation. A few small fighters were drifting through space nearby, obviously disabled or destroyed. The fight seemed entirely over, and the raiders had seemingly abandoned their prize. He'd done it. Had he? He felt a twinge of remorse as he realized that his entire team had been left to fend for themselves without his leadership. Heero had fallen directly into the heat of battle again without another thought. The heat of battle. He only then realized how soaked in sweat he was. It was stifling. After all those years of cold, he finally felt warm. He felt the shakes come on as the adrenaline started to wear off. Better wrap this up quickly, he thought.

“Team, report,” he asked over team Bravo comms.

“Raiders have been chased off, sir. We have one casualty. It was Adams, sir,” said his second in command. “A successful operation. If I might say so sir, you were splendid in that mobile suit fight. I'm proud to serve alongside you. The transport captain sent his thanks as well.”

The cold was seeping in again. Heero shivered. “It was all of us that achieved this victory, not just me. Now, let's go home,” he said, turning back towards Lunar Base. A casualty. He would need to inform Sally that someone died on his operation. Heero thought of the documents he signed about the dangers of recruitment. All of these men and women would have signed them as well. But did anyone truly know what they were getting into before they fought in a battle like this? Was a skirmish over resources worth dying for? And all these thanks from Sally, from the captain, from the team, for more dead people. It was a mistake to come back to a life like this. He tried to remind himself that it was for more than just some resources. This was righting an ever-tipping scale that could throw the whole solar system over. Sure.

Heero tried to think of other things instead, but ended up focusing on Wufei. It was the only real contact Heero had with any of the other Gundam pilots since the last war, and now he was feeling some regret that he immediately chased Wufei away. Heero wondered if Wufei would've understood the endless void he seemed to be drifting through now. They had the shared past of piloting Gundams in the war, at least. No. Wufei always knew what he was doing, Heero thought. Wufei was always laser-focused on an end goal. This encounter never would've turned out any other way. Then those final, fading words stuck out in Heero's mind. “I don't know how.” He didn't think he was meant to have heard that. Heero swallowed hard. He didn't think he'd ever heard Wufei say something unsure like that before. His skin pricked inside his suit as Heero felt a swirl of emotions he couldn't identify. It'd been a while since he felt anything this strongly, and it was more confusing than feeling nothing at all. Was he scared? Heero couldn't tell. His eyes shifted around the cockpit without focusing on anything in particular, becoming lost in the haze of emotion. A short comm burst brought him back.

“Lunar Base.” It was within view. The comm was from his team. “We did it. Successful operation. Time to relax, folks. We're back,” said a soldier on the cruiser. Heero felt like he was breathing again. With automatic movements, he turned his mobile suit to dampen the landing, and slid into one of the wide hangars at Lunar Base with the rest of the team Bravo's ships. Opening his cockpit, he saw Sally Po waving outside on the hangar floor.

“Welcome back,” she said with a smile.

“Do you tell all soldiers that?” asked Heero, as he took off his helmet inside the cockpit and slid down the provided ladder.

“No, but you're a special case. I can't be even a little familiar with an old mate?” Sally's smile faded a bit.

“I don't remember us being all that close.”

“Soldiers like us, we need to stick together. These recruits...many weren't even in the last war. They have no idea.” Sally looked around at the soldiers that were clapping each other on the shoulders as they stripped off their helmets.

Heero paused at that. It was true. Sally did know the sorts of things he'd gone through, even if she wasn't always personally working with him. She was there through the whole war. “Sorry. Someone died on the mission,” he said with gritted teeth.

Sally turned back to look at him. Her eyes seemed to have an infinite sadness for a split-second. “We can discuss it during the debriefing. After that you're done here today. You can go rest.”

“Yeah. Rest.” Heero felt a deeper understanding between the two of them. He felt like he hadn't rested his whole life, and Sally knew that. Nobody had been there to tell him to let go. Having someone else tell him he could rest gave him the sense that maybe he finally could. He trudged into the waiting debriefing room, Sally walking behind.

Heero's second-in-command went over his part of the mission, which mainly focused on keeping the raiders away from the transport. He lightly covered that another mobile suit was there, and Sally raised her eyebrows at this information, but stayed silent. Sally sensed there was a gap in knowledge here, and turned to look curiously at Heero. He made a movement with his eyes towards the door that told her that what he had to say should be confidential. “Thank you, Nilsson. You are dismissed. Good mission. It is unfortunate about Adams,” Sally said, pressing her lips together afterwards. The door closed behind him, and Heero stood staring at it for a short while.

“Wufei was in the mobile suit,” he said finally.

Sally's eyes widened, and she sucked on her lips briefly. “You're sure?”

“Yes. He came out of the mobile suit personally. We talked.”

“What about?”

“He thinks the Preventers haven't done enough to help the colonies. He's tired of waiting for the balance between Earth and the colonies to be restored again.”

Sally sighed as she looked openly concerned. “So that's where he went.”

“Yes. He's with the colony raiders. And he has a space-ready mobile suit, too.” Heero looked more firmly at Sally. “This is the problem with reverse-engineering the construction suits back into war machines. You have them, they have them, and we're only one step away from open war with mobile suits again.”

She held her forehead in her hand. “Escalation leads to escalation, and so it goes. The mobile suits are exactly that – mobile. Nothing else we have competes with their versatility. If they have suits, we need suits, and vice versa.”

“Exactly. So in you making those three suits, you forced him to have that suit to compete with you,” Heero spat out.

“We needed the upper hand first,” Sally said, with slight hesitation.

“He worked for you. He knew what you had. Now the colonies might be making dozens out of construction mobile suits because the Preventers started it.”

Sally stiffened up. “Thank you for the debriefing, soldier. You are dismissed.” She turned her back. Heero stared. “You've made yourself clear. There will be discussions. Dismissed,” she repeated. He snorted, and walked swiftly from the room. He couldn't believe he had expected better than that. Soldiers parted before him as he left in a foul mood for his apartment. They knew at least about the loss of Adams, and left him alone.

Heero turned the lighting down. He'd had cockpit lights glaring in his face for hours, and his eyes hurt. It was then he realized he hadn't taken off his suit in the locker room. Whatever. He'd take it back there tomorrow. He pulled at the suit, which caught and stuck to the skin, still sticky from sweat that hadn't quite dried yet. That reminded him of why, and he felt a rush of heat through his body and the beat of his heart as he thought of the duel with Wufei. Warm again. Heero wondered if fighting was the only way he could feel alive like that. A dance with someone as strong and quick-witted as you. Peeling the suit off his legs, he tossed it on the floor next to the couch and headed towards the shower. He left it on hot and stood under the flowing water. Between the heat inside and outside, Heero felt like he couldn't bear it. It'd been so long. As his eyes swum, he noticed just how affected he was by the blood coursing through his body. Only a second of hesitation, and then he was lost in the rhythm of his hand. He pressed his forehead underneath his other arm and into the cool shower wall. It didn't take long. Heero gasped a little as he finished. He felt far from satisfied, but there was nothing more to be done. With a sigh, he started scrubbing away the sweat and grime all over his body. He should forget about it.

He did take the suit to the locker the next day, to add to the pile of other suits that needed sanitizing. It was just about all he did that day. There weren't any new orders from Sally for him. Heero passed by the other soldiers in the complex, head down, and went directly back to his apartment. There were some instant meals in the freezer. He ate a warmed one on the couch, staring vacantly at the television as it blared some thoughtless variety game program. Maybe he could go out, he thought. But what was there to do on Lunar Base? It was a military installation. He didn't feel like working out, or going to the shopping wing. Or really anything at all. Especially not where other people were around. Heero looked in the bedroom closet, and found a large blanket on the top shelf. Burying his face in it, he carried it back to the couch and flopped down. Mobile games would do for now. He tapped his way through a puzzle game, level after level. After a while he drifted off to sleep again. There were restless dreams of endless corridors with turn after turn, but no matter which way he ran, he never managed to get closer or farther from the far off yelling and explosions he heard. Finally, one seemed to go off right in his ear, and with a sharp breath he woke up.

He groggily looked around to make sure he'd simply imagined it. Everything was normal, except the TV screen showed a sunset with the early evening time in the corner. Kind of a nice idea for a room with no windows, Heero thought as he stared at it. Made it feel like a window. He flipped through the other default screen options. Beaches, aquariums, cliffsides. All nice images of places he couldn't be right now. He sighed as he decided that at the very least, he had to go for a walk. Somewhere, anywhere. Heero headed out and wandered his way towards the park dome. Even soldiers needed recreation during their down time, so Lunar Base had invested in a large terraformed dome. The ceiling mimicked a 24 hour day cycle, so during the base's evening hours, it dimmed and the people cleared out. Exactly what Heero was aiming for. He made a beeline towards a vending machine and selected a can of ice coffee. He didn't feel all that better, but it was something to do. Sitting on a nearby bench, he stared at the twilight faux sky. His contracts were only for a month, with the option to renew. Sally wasn't aiming to keep him here for years straight from the start. She probably hoped he would want to stay, he thought, but this wasn't home for him either. All the politics was really getting to his head. Maybe if it were simpler, easier, he could do it. But he never knew if he was doing the right thing, anymore. He drank the last bit of coffee and contemplated the can for another half minute. Then he crunched it up and tossed it in a nearby recycling bin. The sky was totally dark now. Might as well head back.

Trudging up to his apartment door, Heero finally took notice that something was amiss. It was cracked open. He rushed back through his thoughts—he had closed, it, right? He could not remember. Suddenly, he was more awake than any can of coffee could do. Heero didn't have anything on him at all. No knife or gun could be pulled to the ready. He tried to dampen his nerves. It was still possible that he had left the door open himself in his haze earlier. Pressing his back against the wall next to the door, and as gently and silently as he could, he pushed the door wider open. Heero peeked around the corner. He could not see anything unusual in the dim light of the tv screen. Softly, he stepped in. Without taking his eyes off the room as a whole, Heero backed up, closing the door behind him. Still nothing. He had been as silent as he could, but in this small space surely he would have been heard if anyone was here. It was when he quietly approached the bedroom door along the righthand wall that it occurred. A blade slid out through the doorway, glinting in the dim light. A dark figure behind. With a rush they were upon Heero.

Heero was already stepping backward, but with a grunt they stopped just short, and threw the blade aside. “You're unarmed!?” the figure questioned in disbelief. It was Wufei, Heero realized in shock. “I left the door open so you would be prepared for me. But to have no weapons at all?” Wufei was clearly thrown off his guard. Then, sharp as a needle, he focused in again. “No. Nobody is ever without a weapon.” he steadfastly said, and fell into a martial arts pose before rushing forward again.

“Wait, Wufei—” said Heero, attempting to block the first blow. Wufei didn't hesitate or respond. Heero only barely kept up a few dodges and blocks before taking one directly to the gut. He gasped and curled over.

“Why don't you fight!?” yelled Wufei. He grabbed Heero's shirt and dragged him up again, propping Heero against the wall. Another heavy body blow from Wufei's knee. “Fight me!” Wufei grabbed Heero's chin and ground his head against the wall. “Do it!”

Heero strained to look far enough down to see Wufei. “I don't want to,” he croaked out. Wufei stayed frozen in his anger for a few seconds. His eyes took on a slow look of confusion, darting between Heero's before fully realizing what Heero had said. As Wufei's grip relaxed, Heero's head fell down on his chest. “No, I do, but...” mumbled Heero. Wufei's face started to take on a look of disgust. He went to move away but found Heero had his shirt in a hard grip. “Stay here, Wufei,” came Heero's low voice.

“I don't have any reason to stay if you won't fight me,” spat out Wufei. “Once I knew you were with the Preventers, I expected you would be able to fight me for your ideals if I showed myself before you. But you don't have anything.”

“Why do you need me to fight you?” asked Heero, still staring at the floor, still gripping Wufei's shirt.

“Need? I don't _need_ you—” his protest was cut off as Heero pulled Wufei in closer to him.

Heero suddenly turned his head up to look Wufei in the eye. “You said you didn't know how. To stop fighting.”

Wufei's face suddenly turned a little pink as he breathed a little deeper. “That's not true.”

“You're lying now, Wufei,” said Heero, “and I know because you're just like me. We've been separated from the normal world for too long. The only way we know how to move forward is to fight. But they don't need fighters like us anymore.” Wufei pried at Heero's fingers, but it just led Heero to grip onto Wufei's shirt with his other hand as well. “Wufei. I couldn't remember what warmth felt like until I fought you again.” At that Wufei paused again, inhaling sharply. And it was then Heero took his opportunity to kiss Wufei. Wufei didn't move to twist away, but he didn't exactly return it, either. Not until Heero insisted again with barely a breath before his second kiss.

It seemed like Wufei practically fell on Heero then. He kissed back, hard, and then broke it off, turning his head into the hollow between Heero's head and shoulder, letting his weight slump against Heero's body and into the wall behind. Wufei's hands ran down Heero's body to grip his waist, to dig fingers into his hips. “I couldn't remember either,” Wufei groaned. “You finally—unlocked something—inside me.” He was shaking.

Heero stared across the room, leaning his cheek against Wufei's head and bringing his hand up to start a caress. Wufei suddenly slapped it away and lifted himself up to look Heero in the eye. “I want to feel it again,” he practically growled. Wufei lifted his leg between Heero's to press against him directly, a hand on Heero's shoulder keeping him against the wall.

“Fine,” said Heero, reaching around to grip Wufei's ponytail. Their eyes glittered into each other's for a beat before they lost control. Both vied for the upper hand, pushing, pulling, gripping, licking, biting. First Heero against the wall, and then Wufei.

“Not fair,” hissed Wufei as Heero pulled Wufei's ponytail back so he could trace his tongue up Wufei's neck without resistance.

“All's fair in love and war,” mumbled Heero as he worked down to Wufei's bare chest. Somehow his shirt had already been removed earlier without either of them noticing. Wufei suddenly gripped Heero's wrists and turned him around, holding Heero face-first against the wall, pressing himself up against Heero's back as Wufei not-so-gently nibbled on Heero's ear. They paused there for a second, breathing hard, considering, before resuming their wild dance of power. Both of them ended up in the bedroom, wrestling with each other, becoming more undressed by the second before finally tripping into the bed. There Heero slowly gave way before the relentless attacks of Wufei. He was too tired, deep in his soul, to fight endlessly the way Wufei could. Heero gasped and moaned as Wufei continued, pulled against Wufei, unable to resist any longer. He was overflowing with heat, lost in the haze of this urgent lovemaking. Wufei's hot breath tickled Heero's neck as he buried himself inside Heero. It was the clear desire of someone who wanted everything Heero had to give. Legs and arms intertwined, they both moved together to find their fight's climax.

Heero lay back, sweating and satisfied. He felt limp all over. Wufei moved to stand. “Where are you going?” Heero asked.

“To take a shower. We're both a mess,” Wufei said while facing the other way, hiding his face by turning his back. He walked out from the bedroom and over into the bathroom. The shower stall was a standing cubicle, and he promptly turned on the water. As he moved to step in, Heero slipped in with him, shutting the door behind. “There's not enough room in here for this,” grumbled Wufei, loudly.

“Of course there is,” said Heero, trapping Wufei in a corner of the stall with his arms. Wufei didn't rise to the bait and get embarrassed, but stood firm and glowered.

“What do you want?”

Heero repressed the desire to simply say, “You,” and instead said, “Where are you going after this?” as he dropped his arms. Wufei didn't answer, and looked to the side. “I meant it when I said stay here,” pressed Heero.

“The colonies...” started Wufei.

“Don't need you anymore. Not how you are,” finished Heero.

Wufei sighed and crossed his arms.

“You and I don't know how to stop. Not yet. But maybe together...we could learn how,” said Heero, simply. He felt the water from the shower flowing freely over him, and it felt like years were going away with it. Wufei stared at the droplets in Heero's hair, falling down his face. His composure crumbled at the edges.

“I'm so tired,” Wufei said, dropping his head onto Heero's shoulder. “They'll figure it out without me, won't they?”

“They will.”

“I want to stop,” Wufei whispered. If there were any tears, they were instantly washed away.

“We don't have to stay with the Preventers. But stay here with me,” Heero said plainly. He couldn't afford to let this one chance go. He'd never felt anything like this before. Maybe, he thought, home was more than a place. Maybe this was the key.

Wufei let out a sigh that sounded like it held the weight of a world, and lifted his head. “Okay.” Strips of his hair had fallen in front of his face. Heero slid a few aside to lean in for a kiss, one just as genuine as before, but with a different meaning. “I'll stay,” whispered Wufei. The heat and steam of the water had never warmed Heero as much as those simple words did.


End file.
